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If all the conflicting parenting advice is driving you crazy, check out this easy way to simplify your parenting and get back to basics. It will help you figure out what matters, so you can let go of the rest.
The overwhelming deluge of parenting advice
There’s a huge amount of parenting advice out there. I tried typing parenting into the Pinterest search to see what came up. There were thousands upon thousands of pins.
And every single one of them has a different idea or approach that will revolutionize the way you parent.
I saw posts like “10 things You Should Never Say to Your Kids” and “115 Ways to Be a Better Mom.” And I didn’t even start to scroll down the page.
I raised my children before the Internet really took off. But I do recall the feelings of overwhelm and the worry that I was “ruining my children.”
I remember thinking that there was no way of knowing if I was doing it right until it was “too late.”
The fear of getting it wrong
I have to admit I’m glad I didn’t have access to the Internet, because the thought that there was 115 ways to become a better Mom leaves me feeling inadequate!
The notion that there were things you should NEVER say is scary. What if I’ve ALREADY said them?
How about you? Are you feeling overwhelmed by all the shoulds and musts? The dos and don’ts? The never do this and the always do that?
A simple solution
I have a suggestion. Let’s gather up all that parenting advice into one simple parenting principle.
That’s it! That one simple choice has the power to transform our families
Before we respond, plan, discipline, or worry about what we should or shouldn’t say.
Let’s just focus on the relationship.
What do Children Really Want?
A few years ago I wrote a post about the Top 10 Things Kids Really Want From Their Parents.
For 16 years a teacher named Erin Kurt asked her students to give her advice on being a parent. They were to name those things their parents or guardians did with them, which made them feel happy or loved.
Erin noticed that the same suggestions cam up time after time, so she created a list. You will find that list here.
I want you notice that there is no mention of the things we should or shouldn’t say. There isn’t an overwhelming number of ways to become a better parent. There are 10 simple suggestions.
And almost every one of them focuses on strengthening relationship.[Tweet “Our children don’t want us to be perfect. They just want connection with us.”]
So let’s stop worrying about all that parenting advice. Instead just go with one goal – strengthening relationship.
This simple focus will help you figure out what matters, so you can let go of the rest.
How You Are Already Choosing relationship
If you are still worried just think of all the times you have chosen relationship. Remember
- The time you have spent with your children
- The hundreds of hugs and kisses you have dispensed
- The times you have listened
- The food you made
- The one on one time you have given
- The times you talked over dinner
- The stories you’ve told
- The games you have played
- Tucking your child in at bedtime
- The notes you have hidden into lunchboxes
Remember those things? They count more than you know.
And you can stop worrying, because your children will grow up knowing they are loved and they belong.
Those are two of the greatest gifts you can give them.