Invitations to connect
When I look back on my boys childhood I see how often I was invited to give the gift of time. there are so many memories.
I remember my son’s first day at High School. He came home and excitedly showed me the journal that had been given to him. It had all kinds of features that thrilled him. I marveled at his excitement and gave thanks for his love of learning that would stand him in good stead. I am so glad I took the time to listen.
I remember the day my boys asked me to play Nintendo. I tried, I really tried. I didn’t have a clue what I was doing, but they patiently instructed me and we all laughed at my efforts. Years later they still laugh about it.
I remember when my son asked for help in putting together a large puzzle. It didn’t have any straight edges, so it was challenging and we worked on it after supper each evening for a week.
In every instance my boys invited me into connection. They wanted to spend time with me. I am so glad that I accepted their invitations. They wanted to share their world with me. What a gift.
Your children want to connect with you
The invitations will come in various forms.
- I want a story
- Can we play (insert name of game)?
- Will you play with me?
- Can you help me with my Lego?
- Giving you a blow by blow description of the book they are reading
- Telling you about the things that excite them
- Ranting about the things that really upset them
So whether you are invited to help put together a Lego model, make a fort in the bush, dress up and have a tea party, or listen attentively as they tell you about their favorite book in excruciating detail- the wonderful truth is that your children actually want to be with you. Every-Single-Day.
- Your children need you to spend time with them.
- Your children want you to be a part of their world.
- Your children long to build deep connections with you.
It isn’t always easy, but there will come a time when the chance to spend unlimited time with your children slips from your grasp. Give the gift of time to your children now, because they will quickly reach a stage when they may prefer to be with friends. Then before you know it they will move out to take their place in the world. If you want to be a part of your children’s world as they grow into adolescence and adulthood, you need to be a part of their world today.
Even when it’s hard.
Even when it’s boring.
Give the Gift of Time Anyway
So if the thought of attending yet another tea party is enough to put you to sleep, or you think you simply cannot read that inane Amelia Bedelia book one more time. Even if you secretly HATE board games (that would be me), or you would really rather not listen to a blow-by-blow account of the rules of Quidditch.
Do it anyway. Do it for your child.
Send the message that you want to spend time with them. Show them that they are really important in your eyes.
Give the gift of time. Every. Single. Day.
Now it’s your turn
When was the last time you responded to your child’s invitation to spend time with him or her? I’d love to hear about it in the comments below. If you realize it’s been a while, don’t be too hard on yourself, simply listen for the next invitation and accept it gladly. Do it before your children get tired of asking you and turn to someone else.Want to Read More?
Check out my Pinterest board about “Building Family Connections.”
Follow Rediscovered Families’s board Building Family Connections on Pinterest.